Pastoral Position Paper - Ben Merkle

Scripture promises that we will encounter a number of trials in this life. However, along with these trials we are also given a number of promises about God’s provision and the purpose that He has for these trials. Having an understanding of these promises, before the trial comes, will always be a great comfort to the believer when things begin to fall apart. Unfortunately, most trials aren’t penciled on the calender in advance in order to give Christians time to study up and prepare for the hardship. But there is one very severe trial that we can predict with fairly reliable accuracy. This particular trial alerts us nine months ahead of time, giving us plenty of time to prepare.

I am speaking of course of child labor. Ask any women who has gone through the ordeal, or any man that has watched the ordeal, and the results will be unanimous. Giving birth is one of the most grueling trials, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Not only do we have the testimony of most of mankind, but Scripture also seems clear in its description of child labor. John uses the picture of child birth to describe the anguish of the death of Jesus (John 16:21). Paul uses the metaphor of a woman in labor to illustrate the sudden destruction that the day of the Lord will bring (1 Thes. 5:3).

And yet, child labor is also used to describe some of the most beautiful promises in Scripture. John’s description of the loss of Christ is followed by His glorious resurrection. When Christ returns the memory of the previous loss is blotted out, in the same way that when the child comes the memory of the labor is forgotten. John also uses the word picture of being “born again” in order to describe the effects of regeneration. So we see that although child labor is described as a difficult trial, we also see that the fruit of this trial is one of the greatest joys that we will find in this life.

Because we know these few things– that we can loosely predict when this trial is going to happen, we know that it will be difficult, and we know that God has given many promises of the hope that we can have through it– it behooves the expecting family to begin preparing for the trial aspect of child birth. I am referring to preparation for the trial aspect here as separate from setting up the nursery, taking the child birthing class, and other forms of preparation. Rather, I am referring to the preparing of your soul to go through a difficult ordeal, and through it all, to praise and give glory to God.

There are plenty of stories of women in labor losing their tempers, shrieking and cursing, and generally doing things that they wouldn’t dream of doing at any other time. And most of these stories are true. When a woman is in child labor, somewhere inside, someone turns the volume on her heart all the way up and plugs in four amps. What may have been just a murmur of discontent under ordinary circumstances turns into a deafening shriek in the delivery room. Put another way, the pregnant woman is about to have a number of people come and visit her heart; and this company is going to see how well she has kept her heart in order.

We also have plenty of stories of the horrified husband who is shocked and amazed at the kinds of things that are coming out of his sweet little wife. Here we must stop and remember, that as the convenantal head, nothing is coming out of his wife that he isn’t responsible for. This time of preparation is as much for him as it is for her. He is in charge of making sure that the house is cleaned, and anything that should come out during the trial is as much his responsibility as it is her’s.

So how should the expecting family prepare? First, we are told, “Pursue peace with all people, holiness, without which no one will see the Lord: looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble, and by this many become defiled” (Heb. 12:14-15). Bitterness, when given the chance, will spring up and defile many. It is the sort of sin that easily pollutes others. If a woman goes into labor and has any sort of bitterness within her, it is a fairly certain thing that the delivery room will see this bitterness springing up and causing trouble.

The analogy used here is that of something that takes root. Bitterness slowly grows sending roots that sink deep into your heart. Not only will the roots grow down, but we are also promised that the bitterness will spring up and defile many. Whatever bitterness is held on to will not stay below the surface, but will spring up and defile everyone who is standing near by. For instance, imagine a husband who has tracked mud all through the house. His wife, of course, is distressed by the problem, but instead of addressing it, she allows it to fester under the surface for a while. This type of bitterness is like the carbonation in a glass of pop. It can stay dissolved and out of sight under normal circumstances, but if the can is agitated, it all comes rushing to the top and makes a big mess. Something finally happens that knocks everything loose and she explodes, “What kind of idiot are you!?! Why can’t you understand that we build houses so that we can have dirt on the outside and not on the inside?” Now her husband is most likely to fall into a similar sin of bitterness.

But the author of Hebrews gives us the cure for bitterness– we are to pursue peace with all people and holiness. How does someone pursue peace? A married couple must keep very short accounts. If there is a sin, it must not go unaddressed for long. The analogy of the plant gives us an idea of how bitterness should be battled. It is much easier to pull weeds then it is to pull down hundred foot oaks. Confession of sin and forgiveness must be swift while the sin is still a mere seedling. Although keeping short accounts is always important, as the trial of child labor approaches it becomes critical. A husband does not want to be attempting to encourage his wife through intense labor and have pictures of big muddy footprints across the carpet flash in her mind whenever she looks at him. The seed must be rooted out early on.

Second, a woman should begin to prepare her soul for the trial. Because we already have Scripture describing Christ’s death in terms of child labor, it is fair for us to look at how Christ prepared for His ordeal as a pattern. The most obvious thing we see Christ doing to prepare is His spending a great deal of time in prayer. During this time He was ministered to by angels in order to strengthen Him for His death. Christ also asked His followers to pray for Him. An expecting family should pray regularly regarding the upcoming trial. A husband should also be praying for his wife on his own.

One of the most important things to pray for will be strength. A woman should remember that labor is called labor for a reason, there will be a lot of work. There are many illnesses that involve a great deal of pain, but a person, for the most part, deals with these difficulties passively. The flu, pneumonia, and cancer all are done to you. The patient does not need to exert much more effort than it takes to drink extra fluids. But in labor you will be called on to labor. You will do the work. Even when you don’t want to, you will do the work. Pray that God would give you the strength to focus on the task at hand and to work hard.

On top of the strength and courage that will be required for a normal delivery, a couple should also prepare for the possibility of complications to the delivery. Although a birth usually brings a great joy and blessing, often the birth brings with it another trial. Everyone knows a family that went to the delivery room expecting great things, only to be met with one sort of medical trauma or another. A Christian family should prepare their hearts for this sort of unraveling.

There are two ways that the secular world can deal with tragedy. The first is to let your emotions run wild. When tragedy strikes you shriek, wail, and vent everything. The second way is to stoically hold everything in. This is the morose, Eey-Ore, expect-the-worse mentality. They are never disappointed, but that is because they never hope for anything better. But the ability to truly rejoice when disappointment and trials come along is a gift that only a Christian can really have.

Jeremiah Burroughs links the contentment of a Christian to the understanding of God’s sovereignty. Burroughs describes an enormous ship with all of the sails full of wind, and then points out that a Christian fretting is like a man on that ship, trying to change its speed by running back and forth on the deck. God’s purpose and plan are never shaken. For the unbeliever, this should be a great terror. But for the believer this is the basis for all hope.

The best way for a Christian to prepare for trials is to learn to glory in God’s sovereignty now. You are pregnant because of God’s perfect plan and whatever unfolds with this child is a part of God’s perfect plan. When you have practised seeing the purpose and direction that God has for everything, it becomes much easier, when a trial comes along, to sit back and give glory to God for what He is doing.